Love is a Fallacy (summary)

The narrator was keen, logical and intelligent yet he was only eighteen.

He has a roommate in the university named Petey Bellows. They are on the same age and same background. Petey is a silent-type.

One afternoon, the narrator saw Petey lying on his bed. The narrator said that he will get a doctor but Petey suddenly said that he wants a raccoon coat. He said that he will give anything for it.

It so happened that the narrator’s father has a raccoon coat on his undergraduate days.

He suddenly thought of Polly Espy, a close friend of Petey. He wanted her for some valid reasons.

He was a freshman in a law school and in a few years would soon be out in practice. He is aware of what kind of wife to choose in furthering a lawyer’s career. His specifications fitted Polly perfectly.

She is beautiful, gracious but not intelligent.

He believed that it is easier to make a beautiful dumb girl smart than an ugly intelligent girl beautiful. He asked Petey if he was in love with Polly. Petey said that he does not know if he’d call it love. He kept on asking Petey about Polly but all of Petey’s answers were all negative. He then gave the raccoon coat. He said that he wanted Polly in exchange for the raccoon coat. Petey refused. Later, Petey realized that he was nothing to Polly or Polly to her. The two men both agreed that it is a deal.

He had his first day with Polly. He took her to a dinner, then to a movie, and then took her home.

The next date, he taught Polly about Logic, a science of thinking, and its common fallacies.

He had made a logician out of Polly for five nights. Polly was worthy for her at last.

Then he said to Polly that they have spent five nights together and it is clear that they are well matched.

Polly said that it is a hasty generalization, an argument where there are few instances to support a conclusion. She asked how he can say that they are well matched in a basis of only five nights.

He said that she don’t have to eat a whole cake to know that it is good.

Polly said that it is a false analogy, a wrong argument, because she isn’t a cake but a girl.

He was pleased because Polly has learned her lessons well. He won’t take chances anymore because he knew that Polly will apply her lessons on it so he thought of direct declaration of love.

He said that he loves Polly.

Polly said that it is Ad Misericordiam, not an argument.

He said that if he had not come along, Polly would never have learned about fallacies.

Polly said that it is a Hypothesis Contrary to the fact, an argument where someone can't start with a hypothesis that is not true and then draw any supportable conclusions from it.

He said that Polly knew that the things she learns in school don’t have to do with life.

Polly said that it is a Dicto Simpliciter, an argument based on unqualified generalization.

He went straight to the point. He asked her if she would go steady with him or she will not.

Polly refused because that afternoon, she has promised Petey Bellows that she would go steady with him.

He became angry so he said that Petey is a liar, a cheat and a rat

Polly said that he is Poisoning the Well, an argument wherein someone has hamstrung his opponent before he could start.

He compared himself with Petey. He asked if Polly could give a logical reason why she should go steady with Petey Bellows.

She said that she can and that is because he’s got a raccoon coat.